Snapple

Snapple Green Tea is more trouble than it's worth.

"All Natural! Best stuff evarrrr! METABOLISM!"

Wait, what? What kind of tea has "metabolism" written on the front of it in all caps? It doesn't even explain why. On the back of the bottle it's all like "Natural antioxidants! May increase your metabolism!" But Wikipedia tells the truth. Wikipedia knows everything and it says that epigallocatechin, this "natural antioxidant," can cause liver damage. So THERE.

Also, it has caffeine in it.

The lid of the bottle: "There are approximately 7,000 feathers on an eagle. Find more "Real Facts" at snapple.com"

That's wrong on so many levels. They are exploiting nature to promote their website! Also, the fact that "real facts" is marked in quotations can't be a good thing. It's also bad that they have to say it's a "real" fact. What other kind of facts are there? Imaginary facts? Way to not be cool, Snapple.

Since the nutrition facts aren't preceded by "real," I guess they're not real. Especially since one serving size is 60 Calories, and then the whole bottle (TWO total servings) is 130 Calories. That's not right, Snapple. 60 + 60 = 120. Do you know how to do math, Snapple? Did you even graduate elementary school?

You don't even taste that good, Snapple. You're such a disappointment.